Friday, February 26, 2010

A Day In The Life

This week I bring you some news stories with my job featured.


Lock Down


Some one asked me this week if I like it better on lock down or off. For me it is kind of a toss up. When things run regular, it is easier on me physically. Inmates do the work and it is my job to supervise. When it is time to eat, they go eat. If they need something, they go get it. Of course, then they are free and more dangerous.

When there is a lock down, I have a lot of physical labor I have to endure. I have to bring their food to them, upstairs too. I have to collect the trash and haul them out. I have to collect laundry bags, then pass them back when they are cleaned. I have to pass out everything they need, down to toilet paper. They are behind locked doors, but they are more demanding and work me hard.

Doing Some Good

Occasionally, good things come from a prison. And in this case, good things come to the prison. This guy is really a nice guy. The inmates really respect him.

Fire

This prison closed when ours opened. As a matter of fact, we got their inmates and took over their Unicor. Some of our employees came from there too.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

thursday 13

13 things i missed about my truck

1. it can carry more stuffs
2. its got a sweet water proof bag my mom left in it.
3. the dents make it more aerodynamic.
4. i can go places now that Jennifer isn't hoarding it for her greedy unnecessary needs.
5. i can start putting premium back in it.
6. i can rock with with some E.S. posthumus without hearing about gladiators.
7. i can hit people with my toolbox on a chain.
8. all the chicks check out my pink bondo
9. the tires are too big so it goes faster
10. the cup holder is better than jennifers'
11. i can eject stupid teenagers on sharp turns
12. in case of EMP my vehicle can still run
13. snoochie boochies.

Thursday Thirteen



Thirteen Things I Missed About My Car

1. We can all fit in it at the same time.
2. It doesn't rattle so loud that you can't hear the radio.
3. The seat is adjustable.
4. I can reach the pedals.
5. I can play 6 CD's.
6. I don't have to shift.
7. There are no dents.
8. It has door handles.
9. You don't have to crank down the window.
10. I don't need a step stool to get in.
11. I can steer with one hand.
12. There are no rust spots.
13. It has both air conditioning and a heater.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

No Electronics!

Imagine you are not allowed to watch TV, play video games, or use the computer for a week. What kinds of things might you do for that week?
********************

Man I didn't clean my room in time, and now I'm grounded for a whole week! It's clean now. Well, I guess I have to do stuff like art. I like to paint. Also I can draw a picture. I can also build a fort like a castle. I like playing Polly Pockets and reading Harry Potter books. Me and my sister can play UNO and SKIP-BO. I like to play with my pets. Playing with my stuffed cows is also fun too. I can also play outside. When you can't use electronics, there’s still a lot to do, like this stuff, and more.

Wordless Wednesday








Ethel M Chocolate Factory Cactus Garden
February 19, 2010
Henderson, Nevada

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Tuesday Ramblings

Why Did The Teenager Lose Her Phone Privileges?

Because I busted her talking on it at 1 am. Yep. She lost it for two weeks. She is trying really hard to have it returned to her early, but there is nothing she can do. It is mine. Really, what is so important abut the hoodlums she hung around with at school? Look where it got her. But she won't listen and learn.

I really think I need a vacation. I know, we just got back from Las Vegas, but that is not what I need. I need some time at home to catch up on stuff. Plus I have been on this rotation for well over a year and I never know from week to week what shift I will work or what days I will have off. That will change soon. Starting March 21 and through June 19, I will have the same job, the same place at the same time. I will be working from 4 pm to midnight and I will always have Wednesday and Thursday off. Not my first choice, but I take what I can get.

On Thursday we have a meeting with Carolynn's school. I am not super impressed with their program. It is not all I wanted it to be. They don't require reading. Everything is all about worksheets in a packet. Next year she will use a charter school I like better. Catherine will got to a prep school, but if for some reason not, she will be home schooled like Carolynn. Middle school is rough.

I made chili for dinner and it was so awesome.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Texting Teens

Me: Turtle taken care of?

Carolynn: yes mom

Me: You better

Carolynn: i did

Me: Or else

Carolynn: i did

Me: U sure?

Carolynn: yes

Me: Positive?

Carolynn: yes

Me: Positively sure?

Carolynn: yes

Me: Absolutely positively sure?

Carolynn: yes mom

Me: Really?

Carolynn: Yes

Me: Promise?

Carolynn: Yes

Me: Pinky swear?

Carolynn: Yes

Me: Cross your heart?

Carolynn: OMG Yes

Me: OMG? What was that for?

Carolynn: You keep asking

Me: I was just checking. Geez.

Carolynn: Well i did

Me: Are you sure?

Carolynn: Yes im sure

Me: You don't seem sure.

Carolynn: I cleaned my turtle tank when I woke up. I also had some rice.

Me: What kind of rice?

Carolynn: White

Me: You didn't fry some up?

Carolynn: No, I didn't know how much rice to use.

Me: Oh. Catherine didn't get involved did she? You know how she burns rice.

Carolynn: How much rice to use for fried rice?

Me: 2 cups rice. 4 cups water. In the rice cooker.

Carolynn: Oh, what time are we leaving to Joe and Nicole's?

Me: They said come over at 6.

Carolynn: Oh, okay.

Me: So make your rice tomorrow.

Carolynn: Okay

Me: Did you clean the rest of your room?

Carolynn: It's already clean.

Me: Super clean?

Carolynn: Yes.

Me: Sure?

Carolynn: Cause rooms can fly

Me: lol

Carolynn: and fight crime

Me: HAHAHAHAHA

Carolynn: ha

Me: What else did you do today?

Carolynn: Trained my cat to attack people

Me: How'd that work out?

Carolynn: Very well thank you.

Me: She attack anyone yet?

Carolynn: No

Me: She been getting her vitamins?

Carolynn: Yes. Catherine slammed her paw in the door.

Me: She okay?

Carolynn: Now

Me: Maybe she attacked Catherine and Catherine was defending herself.

Carolynn: lol

Me: Well you said she was an attack cat.

Carolynn: Okay Mom.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Viva Las Vegas

We are home from our fun trip to Las Vegas. We had a blast.

Like I said before, we left late on Wednesday and didn’t tell Catherine. We stopped at Bob’s Big Boy for dinner and we were off. Catherine sure was surprised. We stayed at Excalibur. It was so fun. Wednesday night we stayed at the Excalibur and played some games. We got some ice creams and relaxed.

Me and the girls in the Excalibur


We got up early yesterday and got some Krispy Kreame doughnuts. Then we walked over to New York New York. We looked in the shops there before walking across the street and checking out the shops. There is an M&M World there and a Coka-Cola shop, as well as other gift shops.

David and the girls in the M&M store


We looked around in the M&M shop first then we went to the Coke place. Carolynn and I found a couple of cute clearance shirts. Mine says Coke China and Carolynn’s says Mello Yellow. (Do they even make that anymore?) We also got some cool Coke stuff for my dining room… a napkin holder and a straw dispenser. (I got Coke salt and pepper shakers and some Coke wall stuff last time.) While we were there Carolynn tried the Coke’s of The World samples. Some of them were pretty nasty.

Carolynn trying the Cokes of the world


When we were done there, we headed back to New York New York. Carolynn and David rode the roller coaster while I took Catherine to play some games. Then we went to the village area there and ate. David and Catherine got some New York style pizza. The man gave Catherine an extra slice for being adorable. Carolynn said she wasn’t hungry and I was only a little hungry so I found this little fish fry place there. I got a small basket with some fried calamari and hush puppies. Carolynn ate most of them. They were really good though. Don’t ever believe Carolynn when she says she isn’t hungry.

Next on the adventure, we went for a drive and checked out the sights, finally stopping at Circus Circus. The girls got wrist bands for the Adventure dome and were off to ride. David and I did a little gambling. We won nothing. But it was fun. We saw some circus acts and got a soda. Then, when the girls finally got off the rides (because the place closed), we went to the buffet. Carolynn may have eaten her weight in food products. I think she had 4 full plates and 4 desserts. They had so much good food. I was so stuffed. When we got back to our hotel, we played some more games and I had a couple of margaritas. That was it. It was a long day.

Today we checked out of our hotel and ventured out to breakfast. Everywhere we saw was crowded. We finally stopped at a Winchell’s for some donuts. Then we were off to tour the Ethel M chocolate factory. It is a short tour. They have an M&M store there too. At the end of the tour is the Ethel M chocolate store. We sampled some chocolate and the girls got a couple of small bars to bring home. They also have a cactus garden there. We walked around there a bit before heading home.

Me and the girls in the Ethel M chocolate factory


David and the girls in the cactus garden


On the way home, we stopped in Baker and got gyros at the Mad Greek. We saw it on Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives on the Food Network. The gyros were pretty good. Then we were off again. Now we are home. The dogs really missed us. I thought Gibby was going to have a heart attack.

It was a great and super fun adventure. We didn't do everything we wanted to do, but we did so much fun stuff. There just wasn't enough time. But now it is back to regular life. I have to get back to work and the girls have science projects to work on.

Speaking of science projects, Catherine needs your help. I need all of you and your families to help her with her data collection.

Get yourself a stopwatch, stand on one foot and time how long you can. Record the time and send it to me along with your age. Catherine’s project is determining if your ability to balance deteriorates with age. So do it for the whole family. So send it to me preferably by tomorrow night.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Thursday Thirteen

So yesterday, after my car was fixed... (Yeah, $1000 later it was fixed. OUCH! New wheel bearings, new axle hubs, new brakes, pads and rotors, a radiator leak, a broken tail light, and a missing piece on the spare tire cage, plus a whole 72,000 mile service...) we got this crazy idea to go on an adventure. I have three days off and no vacation time coming in sight. It sucks being the low person on the seniority list. So we figured we would take advantage of this three days.

We came up with a list of possibilities.

1. Spend the day in Long Beach. We could tour the Queen Mary, go to the Aquarium Of The Pacific (I found a deal on line that included admission to both for one price.), then we could eat at Bubba Gumps.

2. Spend the day at Knott's Berry Farm.

3. Spend the day at Universal Studios.

4. Spend the day at Six Flags.

Well, number 4 was out right away when we realized it is only open on weekends right now. Then we had another idea...

LAS VEGAS!

Yes! I found us a deal online. Two nights, a bunch of free kids games, free food and other family type deal coupons at Excalibur. $120. AWESOME! Cheaper than a day at Universal Studios.

When Catherine got home, we were already packed and ready. My friend Tabi agreed to take care of our pets. Catherine had no idea. We told her we were going to dinner to celebrate the car being fixed. We did go to dinner at Bob's Big Boy on the way here. She was so busy playing her games and listening to songs on David's phone that she didn't realize where we were until we were all the way in Las Vegas. It was Carolynn's idea to make it a surprise. Carolynn packed everyone's stuff and put it in the car before Catherine got home. She did a great job.

So now I am writing this edition of Thursday Thirteen from our hotel room at Excalibur.



Thirteen Fun Things We Plan To Do In Las Vegas

1. Play lots of fun games- We did a little game playing last night.
2. Shop- Did a little of that last night too.
3. Go to the Coke store and try Coke products from around the world.
4. Buy M&M's from M&M World.
5. See the light show on Fremont Street.
6. See the water show in front of the Bellagio.
7. Eat Krispy Kreame doughnuts for breakfast- We will be doing that one shortly.
8. Eat wild ice creams from Cold Stone- We did that last night too. Catherine ate banana ice cream with rainbow sprinkles and white chocolate chips.
9. Tour the Ethel M Chocolate Factory.
10. Ride some roller coasters- Not me, but the kids will.
11. See some circus performers at the Circus Circus.
12. Gamble- A little at least
13. Have a super fun adventure!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Wordless Wednesday



Playing The Beatles Rock Band
February 12, 2010
Apple Valley, California


Paul


Ringo


John


Just Missing George

Saturday, February 13, 2010

John, Paul, George, and Ringo

Yesterday I was too sick to go to work. You should never go to work sick. You should be mentally alert in a place like that.

However, I felt okay enough to go to the mall with the gang. We haven’t all gone to the same place at the same time in a long time. Since the Loser Cruiser is out of commission (until later this week) we all had to squeeze into the truck. It was not funny.

Anyway, we went and spent the day at the mall. Carolynn is officially un-grounded this weekend, so she was able to upgrade her phone. She got an LG Envy3. She seems to really like it. She and David each got new shoes. David hadn’t had new shoes in about 3 years. Carolynn just wears hers out fast. Carolynn also made her first visit to the Victoria’s Secret. That was difficult. My tiny little baby isn’t supposed to need bras. Catherine scored herself a new Pokemon thing. I got some bras of my own. (I know..TMI.) I also scored a Valentine’s present… The collector’s edition of The Beatles Rock Band. It has Ringo’s drums and Paul’s guitar and all the songs. We were playing it this afternoon and it is so awesome.

We went to Nick’s for dinner with Aunt Chris and some friends. It was so good. When we got home, the Olympics were starting.

I have to say, they replayed the tragic death of that Georgian luger a lot. It was very difficult to watch. The We Are The World remake was pretty good. But what was Justin Bieber doing in there? He looked so out of place. I am not a fan.

The opening ceremonies were kind of tedious. It was a long time into the show before they actually got down to it. It just wasn’t as cool as the openings of the summer Olympics. But it was nice and I stayed up and watched the whole thing.

Today, I have to be at work at 8. Then I have some groceries to buy. And some dinner to cook.

Friday, February 12, 2010

A Day In The Life

Working The AM Watch


This is my favorite shift. The following happens between 6am and 2 pm. It could be any various prisons. It could be any various weekday. Today I will be working in a housing unit. That is just one of the many places I could work.

I arrive at work to begin my shift. I like getting there early. It makes it easier to find a parking space. I go in and put all my stuff in a bin. A coworker runs my stuff through an x-ray. I walk through the metal detector. It beeps. I forgot my new boots set it off. I back up and take them off and send them through the x-ray. I walk through again in my socks. I retrieve my stuff and walk to a chair there in the entrance and put my boots back on. I put my watch on and my Carmex and wallet back in my pockets. I put on my belt. It is big and Velcro’s to my inner belt. It has a chain for my keys, a radio holder, a handcuff holder, and a packet of non-latex gloves. (I am allergic to latex.)

I retrieve my keys and radio and begin the hike out to the unit where I will be spending my day. I go inside and put my stuff down. I log in and begin my day.

I turn on the lights and begin unlocking cell doors. Inmates begin to trickle out. They warm up coffee and turn on the news (Good Day LA is a popular choice). Some get in the shower. Some are starting laundry. Soon they will go eat breakfast. Some leave now because they work in the kitchen.

After breakfast is over, it’s time for work. Those who work during the day go off to their jobs. Everyone is required to have a job if possible. Some stay in the unit. They work there as orderlies. Some stay because they work a PM or evening shift. Inmates do everything. They pick up trash or they are plumbers. Some prisons have factories (UNICOR) and they work there. Some of them go to school. There are many classes for GED or learning to speak English.

I walk around the unit. I search a few cells. I look for contraband. (That’s anything they aren’t supposed to have.) The inmates are cleaning, sleeping, or watching TV. Some play cards or other games. Some go to the recreation area to work out, play sports, do crafts or just socialize.

Lunch time arrives. They go off to lunch. Lunch is the biggest meal of the day. Fried chicken day and hamburger day are big. As the inmates return I pat search them. Soon I have a mighty pile of stolen food.

After lunch, the inmates return to work. There are more inside now. More are awake. They are microwaving food. There are a lot of ramen noodles in this place. I continue my patrol of the area. I stop for a snack. I check my email.

At the top of every hour they are free to leave and go to or from recreation or education. I monitor the door as they come and go.

At 2 pm another officer arrives to relieve me. I pass him my keys and radio. I gather my belongings and head back on the long walk back to the exit. It was a quiet day. No fights. I found no homemade weapons or alcohol. No drugs. Nothing crazy. If only every day could be like that.

Too bad it won’t be. After all, tomorrow is another day.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Thursday Thirteen



Thirteen Things I Cook For Dinner

1. Chicken Fried Steak, Mashed Potatoes, Country Gravy, and Corn- This is David’s favorite dinner
2. Egg Rolls and Fried Rice- We made this last night.
3. Spaghetti and Meatballs- This is my favorite dinner.
4. Hot Dogs, Fried Potatoes, and Baked Beans
5. Meatloaf, Cheesy Potatoes, and Green Beans
6. Pork Roast Burritos, Refried Beans, and Mexican Style Rice
7. Pancakes, Scrambled Eggs, and Sausage- I know this is breakfast, but I still make it for dinner.
8. Chili and Tortillas
9. Beer Battered Chicken Strips, Mashed Potatoes and Gravy, and Vegetables- We got this one from the mom of one of Carolynn’s friends.
10. Beef Stroganoff
11. Pasta Primavera
12. Pizza
13. Tuna Casserole

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

In The Beginning

As I mentioned before, I have decided to home school Carolynn. The charter school program I wanted to use didn’t have the room for her until fall, so we are going to use a different one for now and switch in the fall. We start tomorrow. I for one am excited and scared at the same time. I am excited that I get her away from the losers that she was hanging out with. I am excited to start on the next part of this adventure. I am scared that I won’t be able to do it and she won’t learn what she needs to
.
Carolynn, on the other hand, is PISSED OFF. I don’t think she actually believed that it would happen. I think she was convinced it would never happen. She basically feels her life is over. I am the wicked witch who wants to torture her. Home school is for losers. She will just be stuck in the house all day with her mean old mom who hates her.

It’s going to be an epic battle. Luckily, I have more on my side than she does. I do worry about her emotional stability. She seems so dark all the time. I worry that she might try something drastic. Her life is ruined, or so she says, I don’t want her to feel like this is it. That kind of thing can run in families and her dad unfortunately tried some stuff similar when he was upset. I worry about it a lot. Hopefully once we get started and she sees that life hasn’t ended, she will chill out and be Carolynn again. I tell her all the time, we only have one Carolynn and we don’t want to lose the only one we get.

Next week I have a lot to do. Many of you may know, my stupid car, henceforth known as “Loser Cruiser”, is broken. We thought it might be the wheel bearings. I have no idea. But next week I should get my tax return and it will be fixed. I have been driving David’s truck since Christmas. (Also known as the “Hoopty Truck”) It is a good little truck, but I miss my car. Besides, we can’t all fit in the truck at the same time.

We made some fried chicken strips for dinner. They were so good.
The weather looks ominous. They say it might snow. Usually, I would say “Woo Hoo!” but not for tomorrow. I can’t have the whole city shut down when I finally am getting to take Carolynn to get started on the home school.

Think warm thoughts.

Monday, February 08, 2010

Fro Yo

People have been talking about it. People at work raved. The Salvation Army guy gave his endorsement. My friend Jamie wrote about it on her Facebook page. I needed to try it.

So we went. To Nubi, a frozen yogurt shop here in Apple Valley. It reminded me of Pinkberry. The difference was in the self serve. I found another difference… The price.

The yogurt was good. They had all kinds of flavors. They had this flavor called Love. It was gross. It tasted like chocolate nasty. I think it had roses in it. You got a huge cup of yogurt. We spent $13 and everyone got huge cups and lots of toppings. David got French vanilla with peanuts. Carolynn got pineapple with no toppings, Catherine got French vanilla with Oreo, whipped cream and peanuts, and I got French vanilla with fresh fruit and pecans. It was so good.

Anyway, I have two days off now. Woo! I am so excited. I hope you all enjoyed my little work post on Friday. I actually wrote a whole bunch of them but I am spacing them out a bit. That may just be too much crazy to spring on the world at once.

Friday, February 05, 2010

A Day In The Life

Conversation With An Inmate


An inmate was given razors in which to shave and now refuses to give them back.

Me- (Insert Inmate’s Name Here) what is the problem here? Why didn’t you give Officer (Insert Hispanic Name Here) the razors?

Inmate- He didn’t give me my food.

Me- I can see the container from your dinner right there on the desk.

Inmate- Yes, but he took some of the food and I didn’t get enough. Stupid Mexicans are always doing that.

Me- I am not a Mexican. Can I have the razors back?

Inmate- I want more food.

Me- Okay, I’ll be right back.

Minutes later....

Me- Okay, I brought cereal and milk. Now can I have the razors and your dinner food box?

Inmate- How about I give you a bag of trash and an old sock?

Me- No deal. I want the razors and the box.

Inmate- Are we talking serious cereal or that healthy stuff?

Me- I got frosted flakes here and some milk.

Inmate- Okay, I will give you two ketchup packets and the razors for the cereal.

Me- Deal. Give me the razors and I will give you the cereal.

Inmate- Only if they don’t go to anyone of Hispanic heritage.

Me- Sure thing. Can you see me? I am white as it gets.

Inmate- Yes. Are you a member of SAG? I will only give you these razors if you like good movies.

Me- Oh I love good movies.

Inmate- Okay. Then here are the ketchup packets and the razors. Don’t forget the milk you promised.

Me- I got it right here.

*******************


In the end, I got what I wanted… the razors. I didn’t really care about the Styrofoam box. I hear he threw it in the trash the next morning. The inmate had a history of trying to hurt staff by throwing things out at them and other nonsense. He could have used those razors as weapons.

Don’t you wish you had such fabulous conversations at your job?